Porn isn't exactly famed for its realism. Women masturbate with legs splayed and backs arched, orgasming after a few minutes of frantic rubbing and moaning. But in reality, those positions aren't necessarily the most conducive to pleasure for women. What might seem hot in a male fantasy — which informs much of the porn we watch — isn't always close to what actually gets women off. I must admit, it hadn't occurred to me that the way I masturbate might have been influenced by the porn I was privy to growing up. Given that many British women received little or no information about female self-pleasuring during sex ed lessons, many of us have been left to fill in our knowledge gaps with porn. A global survey of over 10, people by sex toy company Tenga found just 14 percent of British women learned about sexual pleasure during sex ed at school, and 17 percent of women learned about masturbation. Sex educator Ruby Rare says that much of mainstream hardcore porn shows female masturbation in a very performative way and perpetuates a trope of "a woman lying down with her legs as far wide as humanly possible. Always eager to unlearn habits formed because of the male gaze, I spoke to sex educators and women who masturbate about female self-pleasure positions that aren't shown in mainstream porn.
1. Up & Down
Masturbation should not be a taboo topic for women: Not only does it feel amazing, but it can also improve your health , sleep, and sex life. Whether you struggle to reach orgasm , are a busy mom who needs to do the deed faster, or are simply looking for a different masturbation technique to spice things up, these tips will sharpen your solo sex skills. Assuming you're familiar with the clitoris , it's time you get to know the more elusive G-spot. Located on the upper wall of the vagina, about two to three inches inside the vaginal opening, it swells up when you are already aroused, says Courtney Cleman, founder of the V. Stimulating it can boost the sensations that can help you orgasm that much faster, she adds. While there are G-spot vibrators that help get the job done, to find it manually, insert one or two fingers into your vagina, palm facing down, and curl your fingers back. When you start to feel stimulated , you've hit the jackpot.
Do it face down
Can't get the hang of it, or hitting a masturbation rut? These masturbation tips will blow open your world of self-pleasure. Okay, it's pretty likely that you've touched yourself before, even if just tentatively in the shower during that period of teenage exploration. That being said, plenty of women have never actually reached a full O on their own. And well, part of the reason is kind of depressing. Self-pleasure is one of the most empowering and radical things a woman can do in this world," says Rena McDaniel, M. Masturbating not only boosts your confidence and personal pleasure, but learning what you do and don't like on your own makes it easier for you to enjoy-and actually get off-with a partner.
My discreet newsletter will teach you the best masturbation techniques for powerful orgasms, along with the 5 Dangerous Mistakes you make in your sex life. Click here to get it. The other great reason to read this article is to understand fully your anatomy and what parts of your vagina give you the most pleasure, which seems to be key to having an orgasm during masturbation [ 1 ]. The key is trying them all out and then figuring out which ones you enjoy the most.